"A Prayer of Barrenness"

"My heart aches. I love Him, yes, but faintly.

I desire Him, yes, but weakly.

I want Him, true, but waveringly.

Even the pain that lies within

I recognize to be such faint pain,

A mere discomfort next to the heart-wrenching anguish

That grips true lovers

My knowledge is nothing. My wisdom, infancy.

I see nothing as it truly is.

Eternity what is light. This life of earth what is dark.

Stories remain stories. Not sinking deep within my soul,

And scarring me with Divine invasion

Your cross is a picture, Your Heaven a fantasy.

Tears are sweet emotions, moved by Your sacrifice,

But not the tears of sharing in Your sufferings.

I say Your name so sweetly but do not know it's Face.

All I am is far. So distant, so removed.

But You beckon me come.

Yet, my Lord, I am nothing. I have nothing. I know nothing.

When I thought I had something,

It dissolved before Your beauty,

And I was left naked. Possessing nothing.

Poor for words. Empty of all. Needy and alone.

Even so, my Love, call me.

Yes, do not leave me here but beckon me come.

Though I have nothing, though I am only poor,

Where else would I go?

Whom have I but You?"

By Dana Candler in Deep Unto Deep: The Journey of His Embrace